Pro-choice Activists Disguised as Pro-life Activists Get in Brawl with Pro-life Activists Disguised as Pro-choice Activists

CINCINNATI – Sparks flew outside a Planned Parenthood clinic in Cincinnati, OH on Thursday, as a group of pro-life advocates clashed with pro-choice counter demonstrators. Not all was as it seemed, however.

“It started innocently enough,” said Julie Yoo, 26, an advocate for a women’s right to choose. “A group of us from [The Ohio State University] got a hold of some posters and made some signs, and went down to the Planned Parenthood to act like rabid pro-life morons. We thought it would be fun to lampoon how ridiculous these people are.”

According to witnesses, Yoo and six of her friends gathered with pro-life demonstrators shortly after 3:00 pm, starting wild chants and shouting obscenities at the men and women that were visiting the Cincinnati clinic. Their passion and commitment didn’t take long to spread through the group of twenty or so protesters, and soon, the crowd was riled up.

“We heard about [pro-life protesters] over in Springdale, and a few of us from the veteran’s hall thought it would be a hoot to go down there and stir ‘em up a little,” said Robert Cipriani, 54, an auto mechanic. “It was a slow day I guess. I grabbed a few flannel shirts from my son’s closet, and a couple of rap-looking hats, and a bunch of us went down there.”

Around 4:45 Cipriani and four friends arrived, quickly identifying the pro-choice counter protesters across the parking lot of the clinic’s Springdale campus.

“It weren’t hard to pick ‘em out. They were the ones lookin’ fit to burn their bras.”

The five men joined the demonstrators, and likewise began to whip the crowd into a bit of a furor. It didn’t take long, and the vitriol being slung from across the parking lot was enough to tip the afternoon over the edge.

“It was mayhem,” said Owen Jones, 22, a pro-choice demonstrator. “Those pro- life people flipped over their barricade and starting charging us. Some of us ran, but even more were looking for a fight.”

“It was fun until that moment,” said Julie Yoo. “I don’t know who started running towards them, but none of us flinched in joining in. It was out of control.” Yoo, sporting a black eye, says she has no regrets in doing what she did. “They’re a bunch of violent animals, I think we proved that.”

Robert Cipriani echoed Yoo’s sentiments. “Those pro-choice snowflakes had it coming to ‘em and more. I think we proved how unhinged and fascist these people can be.”

Eleven people reported injuries in the brawl; all of whom are expected to make a full recovery.

by Pembry Cornish